You’re not failing. But you’re not fired up either.

Your calendar’s packed. Your team’s steady. You’re respected, maybe even envied from the outside. And yet, something feels… beige. A little too smooth. A little too still. Like a pond with no ripples.

Here’s what’s happening: you’re not in crisis but you’re also not in creation.

Are you a thermostat, or a thermometer?

Most leaders end up in what psychologists call "default mode" - the mental state our brains enter when we're not focused on the present, often replaying the past or rehearsing the future. It's functional, but it's not alive.

It's like being a thermometer: passively reflecting the temperature around you. Meetings, metrics, expectations: none of which you chose, but all of which you’re managing like a pro.

But leadership by design? That’s being the thermostat. You set the temperature. You shape the environment. You choose how it feels to lead and live!

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The difference isn’t just philosophical. It's neurological.

Research from Yale and the University of British Columbia shows that intentionality (actively choosing versus passively accepting) lights up the brain’s prefrontal cortex, the area responsible for planning, creativity, and emotional regulation. Translation? You literally think AND FEEL better when you're in design mode.

How to shift from ~default~ to ***DESIGN***

It starts with attention. And then, action.

1. Do an impact audit on your calendar

Your schedule is a fossil record of your priorities. So dig into it and figure out:

• What gives me energy?
• What drains me dry?
• What am I doing out of obligation instead of alignment?

If your week feels like a seven-day root canal, something’s off.

2. Create your future job description

Fast-forward to 2026. Describe your dream role:

• What are you building?
• Who are you leading?
• What does your calendar look like, not just your title?

Paint it in bold, messy brushstrokes. Precision comes later. Passion comes first.

3. Say ~no~ like you mean it

Every “no” is a border protecting your sacred energy.

Stop saying yes from guilt and start saying no from vision. Your time isn’t just valuable. It’s a non-renewable resource. Don’t waste it trying to be professionally polite at the cost of being personally aligned.

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Here’s your weekly leadership lens -

Where am I saying “yes” out of habit and what would I do differently if I believed my energy was sacred?

Don’t wait for burnout to remind you.

Because here’s the truth:

Thermometers react. Thermostats decide.

Thermometers wait for the environment to shift.

Thermostats change the environment with clarity, courage, and intention.

You were never meant to spend your career adjusting to someone else’s settings.

Set the temperature.

Design your leadership life like it matters… because it does.

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Ready to shift?

Audit your week. Rewrite your role. Start saying no like your energy depends on it because it does. If you need a coach to help guide you, let’s chat.

My best, always,

Shar